We like to practice it and do not want to hear it ourselves – yes, that the way with criticism.
We never get bored complaining, because there is always something that just does not fit – be it a Bad Hair Day, annoying colleagues or just a bad coffee, there is always a reason to bitch!
Sometimes one does not even notice how much one criticizes daily. Sometimes it happens quite casually, in a sub clause.
I also noticed how quickly and often I let myself get carried away and start to knock something down. How often I criticize myself and how badly I can partly deal with the criticism of others. I take it all very much to heart, even if it was just a casual incident. Especially as a blogger you get confronted daily with cancellations, negative comments and small side blows. Therefore, more ability to accept criticism, but also the correct criticism-practice belongs to my resolutions for 2017.
Self-criticism vs. Foreign Criticism
Tell others what disturbs you about them? No problem, you just want to help them. Since the criticism is only meant good and constructively, the others should not be angered, perhaps even hurt or even offended.
To get told what others disturbs about you? For sure a problem! Criticism hits a sore point, reveals weaknesses that you may already know. Nobody likes to show his weak points – perfection is the ideal, isn’t it? 😉
But where is the difference? After all, we criticize ourselves again and again. Sometimes, perhaps, subconscious, sometimes only small things and sometimes, we go to the court with ourselves harder than anyone else would ever do.
Nevertheless, it is so much harder to accept foreign criticism, let alone to implement it.
To pass cricticism correctly
Since your feedback should have as much benefit as possible, it is extremely important to convey the message as well as possible. That is, the other should understand it and above all do not feel as if you wanted to push him “to the wall”. This way, your opposite can also better accept and implement the feedback. For this you should consider some things:
1) The sound makes the music
Maybe you’re totally annoyed, but that does not use anybody. The quieter and more objective you give your feedback, the better. Emotions have no place here.
2) No verbiage or generalizations
“Always”, “every time” and “actually always” you do “everything” wrong! Nobody wants to hear such a thing and indeed it is not true at all. Nobody always does everything wrong, but only this one time – if at all. Perhaps only a small correction is needed. The more you relate to your counterpart personally, the more he feels addressed.
3) Stay positive
If you get criticism, it is anything but nice – so bring your criticism to others as positive as possible. Take, for example, a possible improvement suggestion. Just be constructive. Take the other into your world of thoughts.
To accept criticism
You’re angry, you’re disappointed, you just do not want to know what you’re opposite is talking about, because you know he is right.
So that you can accept the feedback correctly and maybe even succeed to be grateful for it, there are some things to consider.
1) Stop to block instead
Listen to what the other person wants to tell you before you respond. Who knows what comes at the end of the critical words? Do not start defending or justifying wildly. For your reasoning is also time, after all has been eased and you have briefly thought about it.
2) Ask for
You do not just have to accept feedback. Of course, you can ask the opinion of the other again. You’ll see, the other one will be very happy about it. He sees that you are concerned with his opinion and are ready to think about it.
3) Be grateful
Somebody took the time to give you a feedback. Be grateful for the effort and time the other has taken. What you accept from the said or implement in the end only you decide anyway.;)
Well, that the thing with the dear criticism, even if we practice and get it daily, it is anything but easy to deal with.
I hope you liked the post. If yes, I would be happy if you share the post with your friends, colleagues and the family, so that we all in 2017 better deal with criticism.
Have you ever noticed how often you are complaining? How do you practice criticism and how do you deal with criticism?